The world in all his fire

These past two weeks I have been sat in a very sumptuous hotel, high on a promontory overlooking the Bay of Naples and Mount Vesuvius. For those who have momentarily forgotten their ancient history in AD 79 Vesuvius erupted and wiped out all but the name of the city of Pompeii for the best part of two millennia. The views are spectacular (as are the pasta dishes).







Now, ever the culture vulture I have undertaken a thorough examination of both the sites of Pompeii and Herculaneum, and giggled muchly at all the Roman images of penises (surely penii in Latin?) to be found in the remains. However, my greatest exposure to Italian culture was on the Isle of Capri. There, amongst the remains of Tiberius' villa Jovis and the whole history of Magna Graeca I felt compelled to worship the heights of Italian artistic achievement. Namely Gucci shoes and Prada handbags. And Dolce & Gabbana dresses. I'm pretty certain Nick Rhodes would feel the same.



Today I was sat contemplating the view of Vesuvius from the hotel swimming pool. I was thinking idly about how cool it would be to see Vesuvius explode (from a safe distance) but how it might be significantly less cool for the 700,000 people who live in the direct fallout zone from any eruption. At that moment a very familiar and well loved sound started over the music system. It was the haunting introduction to 'Save a Prayer'. A perfect soundtrack to any sunbathing/ mass destruction by lava incident - why? Listen to the lyrics...

If you can, you'll see the world in all his fire

Take a chance

(Like all dreamers can't find another way)

You don't have to dream it all, just live a day

Don't say a prayer for me now,

Save it 'til the morning after

No, don't say a prayer for me now,

Save it 'til the morning after

Save it 'til the morning after,

Save it till the morning after

I only they'd had Duran Duran in AD79.....

Strictly Come Duran Duran

I would surmise that as I am 37 and my fame is limited to:

(1) having been on the front cover of the Ladybird Book of Guides in 1983 (yes, one of these people is me. And no, I'm not telling you which).

(2) writing this blog (readership: me) and I Miss 1985 (readership: 500 page views per month, but it is anonymous - durrr)

(3) having been interviewed for 2 seconds on Look North in 2008

(4) having given a dreadful radio interview in about 1998 about railway fencing for local radio, and

(5) being in the Brickhill and Bedford Gazette in 1976 for my virtuoso turn as the narrator of 'Norsey, the Elf from the North'

it is unlikely that I will ever be asked to participate in Strictly Come Dancing.

However should I ever appear this is my first wishlist of the dances that I would wish to do:

1. 'Save a Prayer' - a rhumba. For this I would wear white and khaki reminiscent Simon's turn as tortured (new) romantic with no shoes, as seen below.

2. 'Rio' - a tango. Clearly for this I would have to dress up as the green snake lady who writhes around on the deck of the yacht. http://www.duranasty.com/magic_pills/mp19.jpg

I am assuming such apparel would be a big hit with Bruno Tonioni.

3. 'Notorious' - a salsa. This requires a black bra top and cycling shorts. I don't know what Len Goodman will say, particularly about a slightly plump late 30s woman in such attire, but for the sake of Strictly Duran Duran it MUST BE DONE.

And yes, I still fancy them. So my choice of dancing partner would be Simon le Bon because he's meaty enough to lift me up. Nick Rhodes would like the outfits but I never dance with blokes wearing more eyeliner than me.